haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
