i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
