I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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