So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
