how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
