You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
