Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
No subtext here. People are naked.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
