I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
