i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
