idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
