so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
