I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
