I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It's never too late to be topless.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
i think i just lost a toe
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
