She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
