i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
