David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
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