So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
So many bounce houses so little time
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
