im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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