oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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