I love having hate sex.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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