Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize