How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
