Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize