You're so nebulous sometimes
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
