i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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