I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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