Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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