He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Randomize
