Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
