Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
