I hate all girls vehemently.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
sex in a hospital.. check
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
