We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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