Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
