Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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