That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
