I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
