Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
