did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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