was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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