Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
