So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
