You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
