I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
