omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
