A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize