She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
