glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
