So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
