If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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