But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Randomize
