**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
